Keeping the Peace
Embracing the divas, slackers,
pushovers, bullies and drama in
your organization.
BY PATRICK ROPELLA
ROPELLA & ASSOCIATES
Ahhh, workplace divas…always expecting the rest of us
to cater to their every whim. And slackers, well, who
doesn’t just love them? Constantly shirking responsibility and making excuses. Of course, let’s not forget those
ever-respected pushovers—afraid to stand up for themselves,
never knowing when to say “enough is enough.” But perhaps
the most cherished of all people in the office is the good old-fashioned bully. Why life just wouldn’t be the same without his
or her intimidating, hurtful ways.
I hope you can sense the sarcasm behind my sentiments. These types of personalities exist in almost every
organization—and they drive us nuts. Their antics keep
co-workers constantly running for cover. As managers, we
can’t run; we have to deal with them and their constant
drama head-on.
But there is good news. While you may not be able to
change the personalities of the players on your team, you
can take back control. As a manager, you hold the key to
keeping the peace. And using that key begins with understanding the one element that drives obnoxious, overbearing and just plain bad behavior: the ego.
We all have egos. They keep us from thinking either too
highly or too little of ourselves. They’re part of what gives
us the self-confidence to succeed. And they drive our need
to be recognized for our accomplishments. This is all perfectly normal.
But what happens when someone’s ego goes too far in
one direction or the other? You end up with either a true
egomaniac or an insecure wallflower. Either way, these
exaggerations in ego can be extremely damaging to any
workplace environment.
To complicate matters, there lies a hidden irony beneath
all this: those with such high-maintenance or challenging
egos also tend to be your top talent. While these people can
wear your patience thin, the good news is that, most of the
time, it’s worth it. Think about it. Your “diva” salesperson
who takes over every discussion and tries to grab the spotlight, but maintains peak sales numbers quarter after
quarter with his or her confidence and charisma. Your
“slacker” program manager who constantly falls behind on
documentation and reports, but who comes through time
and time again when you’re in a pinch. Then there’s the
department “bully”—your administrative assistant who
continually criticizes other people’s ideas, but, boy does she
take charge to keep you on schedule!
Yes, these high-performing employees will test your
patience and, at times, your sanity. While you know full
well they are too valuable to cut loose, it’s truly a challenge to lead them. So what can you do to get these folks
to perform at their best and on their best behavior at the
same time?
The researchers at Crain’s Chicago Business seem to
have found the answer. In 2007, they surveyed a selection
of managers who handle larger-than-life personalities:
opera divas, ego-intense news anchors and physicians,
and high-strung clients in the bridal industry. What
researchers discovered is that there is, in fact, a common
set of skills and qualities among those who are able to
most effectively manage high-maintenance egos.
So grab your lasso. It’s time to rein in those tough
employees—and take back control. According to Crain’s,
here’s what you need to get the job done:
• Take the time to understand the values, perceptions,
backgrounds and motivations of your difficult employees.
Talk with the individual to get to know them on a personal level. You may be surprised at what you learn; perhaps the puzzle pieces will come together explaining his
or her ego issue. If anything, you’ll at least gain some
insight as to what motivates that person. And, by understanding what motivates them, you’ll be able to offer the
right incentives (praise, bigger challenges, training
opportunities, etc.) to get that person to behave the way
you want them to.
• Demonstrate genuine respect for those you lead. Even
if you have trouble truly understanding an employee’s
motivations, do your best to at least respect the fact that
a variety of personalities and viewpoints make an organization versatile and successful. Show your respect by
making it clear to the person that you truly appreciate
their contribution to your organization.
